For those of you who do not know, my bride Alex is pregnant. Very. Like 10 months pregnant. In the midst of all the discomfort that pregnancy can bring, or so I am told (I have felt fine), she has had such a great spirit of joy and has maintained a sense of humor. We have noticed that when people see a pregnant woman it is almost as if they cannot resist asking a question, making a statement or both...and everyone says the same things over, and over, and over again. Some of them are very polite and encouraging, others, well not so much. With that said last week Alex came up with a list of 20 things you DON'T say to a pregnant woman! Hopefully these give you a good laugh they did us!
20. You are so BIG! Enormous, HUGE, any adjectives that fit- Don't use them!
19. Yep that's a boy for sure I can tell how you are carrying him.
18. Oh yep- it is a girl- I carried my daughter the same way.
17. You will NEVER make it to your due date!
16. You still haven't had that thing! (especially not 3 months before the due date)
15. When is your due date? They must have miscalculated!
14. When is your due date? Oh yea- my birthday is on the 12th, and my neighbor's is the 13th, and my bank teller's is the 18th, and my ......etc.
13. Do you mind if I touch your belly? (complete stranger)
12. I can't believe you are having your children so close together! How will you ever do it?
11. I have never seen a belly so big before! (thanks Annie, hopefully I'll win the blue ribbon at the state fair)
10. Was it planned! (there are no mistakes in the miracle of birth!)
9. Are you gonna eat ALL that?
8. Enjoy your sleep now, you'll never get any when the baby comes.
7. You look so uncomfortable.
6. Are you still tired?
5. Are you STILL eating?
4. Are you gonna get 'fixed' after this one?
3. You look like your gonna pop!
2. Any unsolicited story about the worst labor experience ever. (I've already been there, done that and don't plan on a repeat)
DRUM ROLL PLEASE...
Don't ever, ever, ever
1. Ask if there's more than one! This is the most common, and the worst of them all! Are you sure there aren't two in there- you know it happens, There's no way that's just one- well I guess he could be a 14 pounder!
The day after she completed this list a few more comments were made that just could not be left off of the DO NOT list...
1. We could just knock your legs out from under you, and you would be like a rollie pollie that just can't get up.
2. Is it hard for you to balance? I mean how do you even walk with out falling forward?
3. Does it hurt? (to which I said a simple YES!)
4. If you get any rounder... (I was waiting for the next phrase, then what!) The threat never came!
5. And quite possibly the best- Are you scared? (NO! do you know how many women have gone before me? Including myself?)
Yes people really did make these statements. By the way when people ask, 'Is it twins?' which we are asked at least 20 times a day, with all seriousness we say, 'No, it is triplets.' We get the most sympathetic looks...sometimes we tell them we are kidding, sometimes we get the last laugh as they walk away shaking their head in disbelief.
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